Oil Spill
A Pelican was limping along a dirty shoreline in Louisiana, his wings wet and stuck.

A mermaid exclaimed: What happened to your wings?

Pelican: They got glued together by oil when I dip into the water to catch a fish. The IBRRC (International Bird Rescue Research Center) caught me in a net and gave me the hardest scrub you can imagine. Now I am cleaner, but my whole body is aching all over. What about you mermaid, you look 3 times bigger since I last saw you?

The mermaid started crying: You only got a scrub. Our fortune is infinitely worse. A scientist came by yesterday to take our weight. He told us we were all obese and unhealthy. He was going to snip our tummies and perform a liposuction in order to remove our extra fat. If that didn't work, he would recommend the gastric bypass -- for all of us!!!!

An Economics Professor asked his students: What is the scariest thing for you?
Student (1): Nuclear weapons, Al Qaeda …
Student (2): Oil spill, global warming …
Student (3): Cancer, ALS …
The students keep rattling off the list. One student replied: The word "Every".
The professor looked puzzled: How is that so, can please explain?
The student replied:
I shuddered every time this word was mentioned by a politician because our pocket book inevitably got lighter.
When Bush promised to keep "every" American safe, we ended up with a huge military built-up. When we made home ownership an honorable goal for "every" American, we ended up with a massive real estate crisis and then a huge bailout.
President Obama is by far the worst. I writhe in pain every time he mentioned this word in his speech:
Example:
Mandatory universal healthcare for "every" American;
We will use "every" element of our national power to fight terrorist;
Our government will use "every" resource to clean up the oil spill…

What I am really hearing is taxes, taxes, and more taxes. How can I not be scared?

Entrepreneurship and Recession

1. You work an 80 hour week for a 40 hour pay.
   
2. You embrace the glorified titles of CEO, CFO, receptionist, and gofer all in one.
   
3. You work like a regular staff but you are not entitled to any benefits or severance.
   
4. Lastly, you could be fired by the same company again, but this time you are not even entitled to unemployment benefits.

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